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- af Lene Bang, 10. juni 2026 - in English below
Der lød en uhyggelig rumlen i undergrunden og hele huset rystede. En kop faldt ned fra hylden. Dyrene brølede i stalden. Katten stak af og gemte sig. Rotterne flygtede ud af revner og sprækker og spænede hen over gårdspladsen. Hvad mon det var?
Molboerne blev bange, for de havde aldrig oplevet noget lignende i deres landsby, så de gemte sig under bordene, så de ikke fik noget i hovedet. De havde godt hørt om jordskælv i andre landsbyer, men aldrig oplevet noget lignende i deres egen.
De vidste også godt, at de døde kunne vende sig i graven, hvis der var grund til det. Kunne det være tilfældet her? De måtte spørge den kloge kone. Hun lukkede øjnene, trak vejret dybt og gik i trance. Så fik hun kontakt og sagde med en mærkelig, dyb og forvrænget stemme:
”Det er mig, Orwell, der taler til jer fra graven. Jeg har jo for længst advaret jer om, at STATAN ville komme og overtage alt, og skabe kaos og vende alting på hovedet, så grimt er smukt, krig er fred og at dæmoner skulle være menneskekærlige mennesker. Hver gang I ikke lytter, men går med på rædselsregimet, vender jeg mig i min grav og afstedkommer disse rystelser”.
”Jamen hvad skal vi dog gøre”? spurgte molboerne, og der gik en rum tid inden Orwell svarede:
”Undskyld det tog lidt tid, men jeg måtte lige undersøge det nærmere, for jeg måtte tilbage til historien om Dracula for at finde ud af hvilke kræfter, der er på spil. Vi ved, at Draculas gener lever videre i de øverste magter her på jorden, som ønsker at udrydde menneskeheden. De fører sig frem med deres logofarver rød, hvid, sort, og skammer sig ikke engang over at lave satanistiske håndtegn.
Vi bliver nødt til, at få gjort kål på vampyrerne, inden de gør kål på os. Pludselig giver det mening, at de har så travlt med, at alle skal tvære sig ind i solcreme, for solskin svækker dem og de vil gerne have, at vi skal gøre ligesom dem. At spise hvidløg dagligt og undlade at børste tænder efterfølgende holder både mennesker og vampyrer på afstand, så det er også et godt råd.
Men det er ikke nok bare at svække dem. Hvis man vil have skovlen rigtigt under dem, skal man jage en træpæl gennem hjertet på dem eller skyde dem med sølvkugler.”
Molboerne blev bange, for de kendte godt Orwells dystopiske ”fremtids”scenarier, men de havde troet, at det bare var en fantasifuld roman og ikke en drejebog. Men at gribe til våben, hvilket i øvrigt også var forbudt, harmonerer ikke med molboers blide gemyt.
I virkeligheden var det slet ikke så svært at slippe af med vampyrerne. De blev enige om, at sige ordet NEJ, hver gang der kom et nyt påbud. De sagde NEJ til at betale skat, til at lade sig indsprøjte med biovåben, til at grave CO2 ned, til at forgifte deres køer, til at lade ulve æde deres dyr i Jylland, til sætte hegn op alle vegne og fælde og vandalisere træerne, at bekoste andres luksusliv og meget andet.
Du kan også bekæmpe vampyrer, selv uden træpæle, sølvkugler og hvidløg. Bare sig NEJ og lær dine børn det gode ord, NEJ.
Her har du en række NEJ`er, så du har nogle at bruge af, hver gang STATAN fremturer: NEJ, NEJ, NEJ, NEJ, NEJ, NEJ, NEJ, NEJ, fortsæt selv.
Lene Bang
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22. The Molboes and Orwell
There was an eerie rumbling from underground and the whole house shook. A cup fell from the shelf. The animals bellowed in the barn. The cat ran off and hid. The rats scurried out of cracks and crevices and dashed across the farmyard. What on earth could it be?
The molboes were frightened, for they had never experienced anything like it in their village, so they hid under the tables to avoid being hit on the head. They had certainly heard of earthquakes in other villages, but had never experienced anything like it in their own.
They also knew full well that the dead could turn in their graves if there was cause to do so. Could that be the case here? They had to ask the wise woman. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and went into a trance. Then she made contact and said in a strange, deep and distorted voice:
“This is I, Orwell, speaking to you from the grave. I warned you long ago that STATAN would come and take over everything, creating chaos and turning everything upside down, so that ugly is beautiful, war is peace, and demons would be portrayed as benevolent humans. Every time you fail to listen but go along with the regime of terror, I turn in my grave and cause these tremors.”
“But what on earth are we to do?” asked the molboes, and there was a long pause before Orwell replied:
“Sorry it took a while, but I had to look into it a bit more closely, as I had to go back to the story of Dracula to find out what forces are at play. We know that Dracula’s genes live on in the higher powers here on earth, who wish to exterminate humanity. They flaunt their logo colours – red, white and black – and aren’t even ashamed to make satanic hand signs.
We have to put an end to the vampires before they put an end to us. Suddenly it makes sense that they’re in such a rush for everyone to slather themselves in sun cream, because sunshine weakens them and they want us to do the same as them. Eating garlic daily and not brushing your teeth afterwards keeps both humans and vampires at a distance, so that’s good advice too.
But it’s not enough just to weaken them. If you want to really finish them off, you have to drive a wooden stake through their hearts or shoot them with silver bullets.”
The country folk were frightened, for they were well aware of Orwell’s dystopian ‘future’ scenarios, but they had thought it was merely a fanciful novel and not a script. But taking up arms, which was, incidentally, also forbidden, did not sit well with the molboe’s gentle disposition.
In reality, it wasn’t that difficult to get rid of the vampires. They agreed to say the word ‘NO’ every time a new decree was issued. They said NO to paying tax, to being injected with biological weapons, to burying CO2, to poisoning their cows, to letting wolves eat their livestock in Jutland, to putting up fences everywhere and felling and vandalising trees, to footing the bill for other people’s luxurious lifestyles, and much more.
You can also fight vampires, even without wooden stakes, silver bullets and garlic. Just say NO and teach your children that good word, NO.
Here are a few ‘NO’s’ for you to use whenever the STATE gets out of hand: NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, carry on yourself.
Lene Bang
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